How to Tell Your Friends and Family You're Eloping
You’ve made the exciting decision to elope—choosing adventure, intimacy, and a wedding day that’s truly about you. But now comes the tricky part: telling your friends and family.
As an adventure elopement photographer in the Smoky Mountains, I’ve worked with so many couples who have faced this exact challenge and have faced it myself. Whether you’re worried about disappointing loved ones or just not sure how to break the news, this guide will help you navigate those conversations with love and confidence.
Get Clear on your "Why"
Before you share your decision, take some time to reflect on why you’re choosing to elope. Maybe you want a stress-free day filled with adventure, or you prefer an intimate experience that truly reflects your relationship, or you want to hike to the top of a mountain in a National Park that doesn't allow large crowds.
Having a clear understanding of your reasons will help you explain your choice in a way that feels authentic and reassuring to those who care about you.
Decide When to Share the News
When and how you tell your family depends on your relationship dynamics. Some couples choose to share their plans early, while others wait until after the elopement. Consider these options:
- Before the elopement: If you think your loved ones will appreciate being included in the journey, telling them in advance gives them time to process and support you.
- After the elopement: If you anticipate pushback or simply want to keep the experience private, you might choose to share the news afterward with a heartfelt announcement along with your gorgeous photos from the day.
There’s no right or wrong approach—just what feels best for you.
Example:
"We wanted to share some exciting news—after a lot of thought, we’ve decided to elope in the Smoky Mountains! We love the idea of an intimate, stress-free wedding where we can focus completely on each other. We know this might be different from what you expected, but we hope you can share in our joy."
Have Honest, Heartfelt Conversations
If you’re telling your family and friends beforehand, have a personal, honest conversation with them. Keep these tips in mind:
✔ Tell them in person (or on a call) if possible – It’s easier to convey excitement and reassure them when they can hear your voice or see your expressions.
✔ Use "we" statements – This reminds them it’s a mutual decision, not just one person’s choice.
✔ Acknowledge their feelings – If they’re disappointed, let them know you understand but that this is what feels right for you.
Offer Ways to Include them
One of the biggest concerns family and friends may have is feeling left out. Even if they won’t be there in person, there are plenty of ways to make them feel included:
📸 Share your elopement photos & video – Let them relive the experience through stunning visuals of your day.
💌 Send a heartfelt announcement – A beautiful elopement announcement card can make loved ones feel special.
📅 Host a celebration later – Plan a post-elopement party or intimate dinner to celebrate with family and friends. For my husband and I, we hosted a reception the next day where we played the video from our elopement, allowing everyone who could not make the hike to experience it.
📞 Involve them virtually – If you want, consider a live video call after the ceremony or a recorded message to share the moment.
Reassuring them that they matter—even if they’re not there—can go a long way.
Stay Firm in Your Decision
Not everyone will immediately understand or support your choice, and that’s okay. Some might need time to adjust to the idea. The important thing is that this is your wedding day, and you deserve to celebrate it in a way that feels true to you.
If someone reacts negatively, simply remind them:
"This is what feels right for us, and we hope you can be happy for us. We love and appreciate you, and we can't wait to share this special chapter of our lives with you in our own way."
Stay Firm in your Decision
Eloping is a bold, beautiful choice, and it deserves to be celebrated! Whether you’re exchanging vows on a mountain peak, beside a rushing waterfall, or in the heart of the forest, your wedding day will be filled with love, adventure, and memories that are uniquely yours.
🎉 Thinking of eloping in the Smoky Mountains? I’d love to help capture every breathtaking moment! Let’s plan an unforgettable experience that’s just as adventurous as your love story. Reach out today to start planning your dream elopement! 📸✨
